just another persons waste of time
Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others,
are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.
Douglas Adams

.: Humor :.

30 August 2010
.: this ice cream truck didn't make it home in time :.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 9:30 AM MDT
Tags: Humor Photos
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28 July 2010
.: men have better friends :.
Friendship among Women:
A woman didn't come home one night. The next morning she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's house. The man called his wife's 10 best friends. None of them knew anything about it.
Friendship among Men:
A man didn't come home one night. The next morning he told his wife that he had slept over at a friend's house. The woman called her husband's 10 best friends. Eight confirmed that he had slept over, and two said he was still there.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 9:13 PM MDT
Tags: Humor
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08 July 2010
.: on the gulf of oil ... :.
The Gulf of Oil from Space on Day 75 -- Mother Jones
This Earth Observatory posted this image from July 4th of oil from the
damaged Deepwater Horizon oil well off the Mississippi Delta. The MODIS
on NASA’s Terra captured the natural-color image. The oil appears as an
uneven light gray shape east-southeast of the delta.
~ ~ ~
BP: Putting the "Fun" in Dysfunction -- Mother Jones
Talk about creepy foresight meets dark humor: The UK Metro unearthed a
1970s board game marketed by BP, "Offshore Oil Strike." The game's tag
line, "The thrills of drilling, the hazards and rewards as you bring in
your own …" seems somewhat regrettable given the company's current
situation.
Read on ...
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 6:00 PM MDT | Updated: 08 July 2010 6:08 PM MDT
Tags: Environment Humor News Science
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14 March 2010
.: mmm, pi :.
Pi day: Five tasty facts about the famous ratio -- New Scientist
Mathematics enthusiasts will this weekend be celebrating Pi day, which
falls on 14 March in honour of the famous ratio's first few digits,
3.14. You probably know that pi is the circumference of a circle divided
by its diameter, but here are some less familiar facts about the
mathematical constant. We did consider giving you 3.14 facts but alas we
had five…
Read on ...
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 7:04 PM MDT
Tags: Humor Science
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06 March 2010
.: i just wish ... :.
... I was half as cool as this guy. (thanks to Ars Technica)
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 11:58 AM MST
Tags: Humor Video
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.: fire lane, what fire lane? :.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 11:14 AM MST | Updated: 22 August 2010 5:46 PM MDT
Tags: Humor Photos
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25 February 2010
.: a philosophical calvin :.
I think I can relate ...
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 7:12 AM MST
Tags: Comics Humor
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19 February 2010
.: just a meaningless and intangible social construct :.
U.S. Economy Grinds To Halt As Nation Realizes Money Just A Symbolic, Mutually Shared Illusion - The Onion
The U.S. economy ceased to function this week after unexpected
existential remarks by Federal Reserve chairman Ben Bernanke shocked
Americans into realizing that money is, in fact, just a meaningless and
intangible social construct.
What began as a routine report before the Senate Finance Committee
Tuesday ended with Bernanke passionately disavowing the entire concept
of currency, and negating in an instant the very foundation of the
world's largest economy.
"Though raising interest rates is unlikely at the moment, the Fed will
of course act appropriately if we…if we…" said Bernanke, who then paused
for a moment, looked down at his prepared statement, and shook his head
in utter disbelief. "You know what? It doesn't matter. None of this --
this so-called 'money' -- really matters at all."
read on ...
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 2:10 PM MST
Tags: Humor
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27 September 2009
.: the mass had to go somewhere :.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 8:03 PM MDT
Tags: Comics Humor
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.: ????? :.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 8:00 PM MDT
Tags: Humor
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09 September 2009
.: the functionality of a word :.
Shit may just be the most functional word in the English language.
You can smoke shit, buy shit, sell shit, lose shit, find shit, forget shit, and tell others to eat shit.
Some people know their shit, while others can't tell the difference between shit and shineola.
There are lucky shits, dumb shits, and crazy shits. There is bull shit, horse shit, and chicken shit.
You can throw shit, sling shit, catch shit, shoot the shit, or duck when the shit hits the fan.
You can give a shit or serve shit on a shingle.
You can find yourself in deep shit or be happier than a pig in shit.
Some days are colder than shit, some days are hotter than shit, and some days are just plain shitty.
Some music sounds like shit, things can look like shit, and there are times when you feel like shit.
You can have too much shit, not enough shit, the right shit, the wrong shit or a lot of weird shit.
You can carry shit, have a mountain of shit, or find yourself up shit creek without a paddle.
Sometimes everything you touch turns to shit and other times you fall in a bucket of shit and come out smelling like a rose.
When you stop to consider all the facts, it's the basic building block of the English language.
And remember, once you know your shit, you don't need to know anything else!
Well, shit, it's time for me to go. Just wanted you to know that I do
give a shit and hope you had a nice day, without a bunch of shit. But,
if you happened to catch a load of shit from some shit-head ... well,
shit happens!
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 3:18 PM MDT
Tags: Humor
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30 May 2009
.: a public service anouncement :.
Protect Yourself from Ambulatory Gadget Fixation Syndrome (AGFS) - PC World
"Hey. Hey. Hey! hey! hey! Look up. Look up. Look up." That's me walking
to work on Second Street in San Francisco, about to get into a head-on
with someone whose full attention is on the smart phone or Kindle
they're holding close to their face while walking, paying no attention
to where they're going.
Sometimes they don't even hear me (most of them have their headphones
in), forcing me to veer widely out of their path. Sometimes they hear
me, look up momentarily with a sort of glazed-over look, then return to
the device. Sometimes they hear me and alter their course, shooting me a
look that says: "how dare you; I was updating my Facebook." Like I had
just violated one of their most basic rights.
read on ...
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 6:07 PM MDT
Tags: Humor
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19 April 2009
.: not enough conga :.
Prickly City by Scott Stantis -- 19 April 2009
Drum circle anyone?
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 8:41 PM MDT
Tags: Comics Humor
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18 April 2009
.: at the end of the rainbow :.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 3:26 PM MDT
Tags: Humor
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09 March 2009
.: lol :.
Dick Locher - 06 March 2009
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 5:38 PM MDT
Tags: Humor
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28 January 2009
.: from sg1 "heroes part 1"-- on kids :.
DIXON: Yeah, all-night screaming, projectile vomiting, nuclear diapers. You have no idea. The reason they make them so damn cute is so you don't suffocate them in their sleep.
WELLS: Sir, you have four kids.
DIXON: Yeah, why do you think I enjoy my job so much? Don't get me wrong, I love the little buggers to death, but trust me, having four kids makes going through a Stargate and facing off against alien bad guys look like nothing. This is relaxing.
WELLS: Then why did you have four?
DIXON : Well One's pretty bad, but you figure you've got to have two so the little guy could have a brother or sister, right? Then you have two boys and the wife says she wants a girl, so you figure, "hell, three can't be much worse than two," right? What you don't realize is your brain is fried because you haven't slept. After three, four is no big deal. You're so deep in it, nothing seems to matter anymore. It's chaos. You just try to make it through each day alive. In the end You spend all the energy you have left trying to get them into bed, only to lie awake praying they don't get hooked on drugs, hurt, or worse, end up dead in an alley somewhere.
WELLS: Can't wait, Sir.
DIXON: Yeah, miracle of birth, my ass. I'll tell you what a miracle is. Birth control that works.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 5:46 PM MST
Tags: Humor
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16 December 2008
.: ah, so that is where that tradition started :.
When four of Santa's elves got sick, the trainee elves did not produce toys as fast as the regular ones, and Santa began to feel the pre-Christmas pressure.
Then Mrs Claus told Santa her Mother was coming to visit, which stressed Santa even more.
When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two others had jumped the fence and were out, Heaven knows where.
Then when he began to load the sleigh, one of the floorboards cracked, the toy bag fell to the ground and all the toys were scattered.
Frustrated, Santa went in the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered the elves had drank all the cider and hidden the liquor. In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider jug, and it broke into hundreds of little glass pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and found the mice had eaten all the straw off the end of the broom.
Just then the doorbell rang, and irritated Santa marched to the door, yanked it open, and there stood a little angel with a great big Christmas tree.
The angel said very cheerfully, 'Merry Christmas, Santa. Isn't this a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to stick it?'
And so began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 6:19 PM MST
Tags: Humor
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31 October 2008
.: pumpkins :.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 11:57 AM MDT
Tags: Humor
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08 May 2008
.: the farmer and the car dealer :.
There was a farmer, Perley Moore, who had recently bought a truck and found that the "basic price" was only the beginning. Once the salesman had added on all the extras - towing package, toolbox, fifth-wheeler attachment, etc. - the price was quite a bit higher. Well, by a strange turn of fate, that same salesman stopped by Perley's farm one day to buy a cow. The dealer examined the herd, picked out a likely specimen, and asked about the price.
"That's a hundred-dollar cow," Moore replied directly.
"That's fair enough," said the salesman. "I'll take her."
"Well, now, that's the basic price," Moore added, getting out pencil and paper. "There are one or two extras, of course." He made a few notes and handed the paper to the dealer. Here is the final invoice:
Basic cow $100
Two-tone exterior $45
Storage compartment and dispensing device $60
Four spigots @ $10 each $40
Genuine cowhide upholstery $75
Dual horns @ $7.50 each $15
Automatic fly-swatter $35
Total $370
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 7:03 AM MDT
Tags: Humor
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06 March 2008
.: what planet is this guy from :.
Check out this post on Craigslist - a Toshiba 600MHz laptop with 64MB of memory and a 6GB harddrive for only $240 !!!!
Oh... and it's "INTERNET READY" with a 56K modem.
Better jump on this deal!
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 12:31 PM MST
Tags: Humor Internet Surfin'
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23 February 2008
.: roflmao :.
I know, it's in bad taste, but that doesn't mean it's not funny!
And remember, please think of the kittens.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 9:32 PM MST | Updated: 23 February 2008 9:42 PM MST
Tags: Humor
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.: red shirt every time! :.
Many more here.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 9:19 PM MST
Tags: Humor Internet Surfin'
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.: not the start of a good day ;) :.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 9:15 PM MST
Tags: Humor
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17 January 2008
.: lol :.
via Ubuntu Gallery
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 9:07 PM MST
Tags: Humor Linux
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09 January 2008
.: snickering :.
I just cracked up when I saw this, a Neiman-Marcus Signature Dog Bone.
And they say people spoil their pets.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 3:10 PM MST | Updated: 09 January 2008 3:14 PM MST
Tags: Humor
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02 January 2008
.: lists :.
Top ten reasons I procrastinate:
1.
Hmm ... I'll finish this later.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 4:02 PM MST
Tags: Humor
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19 December 2007
.: commodity markets shocked :.
This just in from PNC, the Christmas Price Index, aka 12 Day$ of Chri$tma$, is up 3.1% this year compared to 2006.
Watch the report here.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 7:22 AM MST
Tags: Humor Internet Surfin'
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14 December 2007
.: what's a guy to do? :.
how bad is the writers strike affecting the late night hosts?
Dave can't even affort a razor anymore!
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 3:04 PM MST
Tags: Humor Photos
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30 November 2007
.: brother, can you spare a beer? :.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 9:59 AM MST | Updated: 30 November 2007 1:15 PM MST
Tags: Humor Photos
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06 November 2007
.: dj master yoda :.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 8:01 AM MST
Tags: Humor
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04 November 2007
.: you try to save a dog ... :.
I did a little animal rescue, but I don't think it is going to work out.
He keeps using my computer for Doggy Porn and drinking all my Fat Tires !!!
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 9:43 AM MST
Tags: Humor
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07 October 2007
.: bored? :.
Peruse best-of-craigslist
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 3:16 PM MDT
Tags: Humor
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01 October 2007
.: watch and laugh :.
Frank Caliendo on Letterman during Impressionists Week - youtube
David Lettermans "Top Ten Favorite George Bush Moments" - youtube
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 5:38 PM MDT
Tags: Humor Video
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13 August 2007
.: ouch :.
You have to wonder who the sign is for, the driver or the pedestrian.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 8:00 AM MDT
Tags: Humor
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02 August 2007
.: mans evolution :.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 6:10 PM MDT
Tags: Humor
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24 July 2007
.: kirk, spock, mccoy & 'ensign gomez' beam to a planet. who's not returning? :.
A brilliant post on "
10 things i hate about star trek". It's a good laugh, hell, I'm still
chuckling.
While your there, check out the replies, the bashing is pretty humorous in of itself.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 11:01 PM MDT
Tags: Humor Internet Surfin'
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21 July 2007
.: definitely applies to dogs also :.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 9:18 AM MDT
Tags: Humor
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03 July 2007
.: lol :.
via Fake Steve Jobs
A few iPhone units are having some battery problems
A nice play on the Dell battery fires.
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 4:08 PM MDT
Tags: Humor Internet Surfin'
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28 June 2007
.: doh! :.
So Bush and Cheney are having breakfast at a diner in Washington when
the waitress comes up and Bush says, "Can I have a quickie?"
The
waitress grabs the menu away and storms off, saying "I thought we were
done with that nonsense after Clinton left!"
Cheney leans over
to Bush and says, "Sir, it's actually pronounced 'quiche'."
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 12:07 AM MDT
Tags: Humor
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20 June 2007
.: lol :.
Apple Computer announced today that it has developed a computer chip that can store and play music in women's breast implants.
The iBOOB will cost between $499 and $599. This is considered to be a major breakthrough because women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them.
via mrgreensmistress
~ ~ ~
Posted by: Peter - 10:33 PM MDT
Tags: Humor
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